Hey Simon,

What do you write about when it’s over 10 years, and there’s no other words except to tell you that I miss you. It’s been big last few weeks. We had the event in your memory and broke our own record of raising money. I took your mum, dad, grandma to high tea for mother’s day. We all went to see S two weeks back to celebrate his 40th and world cup news. And it hurt so much that you weren’t there. It could’ve been all of us, our kids with entire family. How amazing that would’ve been. Your niece and nephew playing board games. We missed you so much. I missed you so much. Then I did Pandora’s legacy by myself and missed you. I still suck at puzzles. I just cant see those weird connections that you always picked on so quickly. We would’ve been the unstoppable team at these. And because all these experiences so close to each other weren’t enough, Prof Richard died. Another life claimed by brain cancer, another hope lost.

It just seems so hopeless, the way the world is today. You would’ve hated it. People are so angry and impatient, on the roads, in the shops, on social media. I can’t understand how so many people can be so hateful. What happened to agreeing to disagree? In fact someone was rude to me to me the other day at the doggy day care. Imagine being there to pick up a happy little thing, but not be able to wait 5 minutes. I was so shocked by his behaviour. But that’s what we get when everyone thinks their time is worth more than others. Obviously I missed coming home to you. I was thinking about setting up a dating profile the other day, but honestly I have no energy to deal with people. I just want you to come back.

I do have to say that my gaming group locally has been amazing. They all showed up to your event. And while I was away (yup, your girl has been using up her vacation days), they ran all our events without any issues. I’m definitely lucky to be surrounded by so many nice people esp when you look at the wider world.

It’s taken me entire day to write this little letter. I wish I could explain in words how much I still miss you and how much it hurts that you aren’t here, listening to me in person. This was meant to be a cathartic exercise when I started it. Unfortunately all this time, and it still doesn’t get easier. I love you and miss you.

With all my love.